Monday, January 11, 2010

BRICKS AND MORE TARDS

Well, the Foxwoods trip was a blast.
The tourney went badly, with two ridiculous beats back to back to knock me out, but I was proud of the way I played. The $60 turbos have quite a few hopeless players who probably watched a little WSOP on ESPN, and figured they'd give it a shot. Easy marks (if you can dodge the horrific suckouts). One guy at my first table called the floor over to argue for three minutes about the dealer calling "blinds up" with five seconds left on the level clock. Really? Are you serious? Play at our table came to a screeching halt for three full minutes while this ancient nutbag argues over losing five seconds in a turbo format. Brilliant move you fucking poser! He kept saying he "didn't appreciate" the dealer cheating him. The TD carefully explained that if the dealer can't begin dealing before time on a level expires, then he can announce the blinds going up. Since the dealer hadn't even started putting the old deck in the shuffler and pulling out the new one, he was in the right. Unfortunately it took awhile to explain this to the offending a-hole while we sat around with the action on him of course. I should have called clock on him! Oh well, by the end of the whole debacle, everyone at my table wanted to shove his stupid scrimshaw card protector so far up his ass that it would peek out of his nose with the rest of his hideous old man nose hairs. Bah! When are they going to open the "under 50 only" casino?
If I thought that guy was bad, I had a shock waiting for me at the dreaded $2-$4 No-Fold 'em limit table. There's a reason I vowed to never play at these! I will not make that mistake again. After a slow torture for an hour, I decided to at least get something out of the trip and start drinking. I'd only drank a couple times in the past 6-7 months, but as soon as I started drinking the cards turned around for me. What is God trying to tell me? Long story short, I had a blast getting hammered at the video poker bar, and held my own at the $1-$2 NL table, which is where I feel like I belong for the first time!
The bottom line of the trip was that I got to spend some great time with my friends (we even got to play at the same tables because Foxwoods was so deserted). I walked out of a casino with only $20 less than I walked in with, and that's less than the money I tipped for drinks! I love live play, and I always seem to do better than online, but internet poker certainly has it's advantages. Quicker play, readily available info (chip stacks, mucked cards, etc), and most importantly, it's a lot easier to block chat. Also, you are protected from the germs, sights, and smells of the casino, as evidenced by the sloppy, career degenerate, who had clearly given up on competing in society and was sitting next to me openly farting and bitching about everyone's play at the 2-4 table. Truly the darkside of brick and more tards poker......

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