Saturday, December 25, 2010

Wednesday, December 15, 2010


You know you're old when:

Your doctor is younger than you.

All slang starts to sound ridiculous.

One of your younger facebook friends comments on how creepy it was that some guy (who happens to be the same age as you) was hitting on her friend.

You hear "45" and think of a vinyl record, not a gun.

You remember cords on phones.

You refer to an iPod as a "contraption."

The guy at the grocery store calls you "sir."

You prefer every band's "older, better" music.

You owned a typewriter.

You need to get an 8 year old to show you how to work the DVR.

One word: Matlock.

You remember Michael Jackson as a young black man, not an old white woman.

All the best athletes from your childhood are now fat coaches.

The bouncer apologizes after carding you.

Instead of laughing at those silly motorized chairs that go up stairs, you start wondering how much they cost.

Every young person is attractive, simply because they're young.

You long for the pre DNA days when serial killing was so much easier. (just kidding, just kidding...........I actually enjoy the challenge)

You've seen somebody smoking on a plane in your lifetime.

Wide ties have been popular and unpopular more than twice each in your lifetime.

All your favorite actors start dying.

You care less about the future of the planet, and more about always knowing where the closest bathroom is.

You watch CBS (sorry- I'm contractually obligated to make at least one "old people watch CBS" joke).

You can remember when Sally Struthers was hot.

You know who Sally Struthers is.

You forgot what the category was half way through this list.

Now I have to go eat some fiber, bitch about skateboarders, horribly mispronounce some young celebrity's name, and write a letter to the newspaper (whatever the hell that is).

Sunday, December 12, 2010

100th POST

My 100th post!

This started as a poker blog called FELT UP a little over a year ago. It evolved into a space for writing about pop culture and such called THROWIN' ROCKS. Since I started it I have:

•Lost almost 100 pounds (that's about a pound per post for those of you not very good at math. I still need to write another 50 posts or so if you know what I mean...)

•Doubled my readership from one to two people (that's a 100% increase for the math challenged).

•Started going to the dentist again after five years and had a root canal, six fillings, scaling and planing, and learned how to bloody well brush my teeth.

•Finally got up the nerve to go to a doctor for only the second time in the past 25 years and was incredibly relieved to find out that I don't have diabetes, but I do have hypothyroidism, which I now take medicine for.

•Completed 18 paintings and sold five.

•Memorized every U.S. state capital.

•Watched over 200 movies (again, that's one every other day for the numerically impeded).

•Finished 5th in the 4th Annual Turkey Cup (the 3rd Annual Turkey Cup was the poker tourney that originally inspired me to start this blog).

•Realized how old and how young I am at the same time.

•Discovered the joy of betting on fantasy football.

• Got a driver's license after not having one for 17 years.

It's been a great year, and 2011 is going to be even better, but I'm still unemployed and looking for a place to move, so if you know of anything, let me know!

Thank you for your continued support (both of you).

Tuesday, December 7, 2010


Here's a little movie I made on xtranormal about my facebook experiences. Most of the status updates are actual posts from my facebook friends.....